The bag, the murse, the review.

Two weeks ago, I post my Wordless Wednesday, with pictures of my attempt at finding a newer, awesome, svelte looking bag to hide my d-supplies in when I travel. More so for things like days at theme parks, conferences, and basic travel. Basically for my trip to FFL in a few days. (I was gonna go all psycho crazy with exclamation points and joy, but I think those of you who know, know how excited I am. For those of you who didn't know already, sorry you missed that memo, and now you do.) Anyway, yeah so I bought this pretty awesome Timbuk2 bag and have been demoing it the past two weeks.

You gotta test drive things before you put them to the test right?? This little guy has gone through the ringer more or less. I am very picky about my murse. I mean if I am dragging this thing around with me all the time, I am going to make sure it is PERFECT! Is this bag perfect? No. Nothing will be unless I master the skills of nylon bag making, stitching, and well cutting straight lines.

The Pros:
- Thin profile
- Able space for the stuff I need

- Able size to keep me from throwing everything but the kitchen sink in the bag (I over prepare)
- Nice color. I love Blue. If you see at FFL next week you will see that in my wardrobe choice especially my sneakers. Technically the blue on the bag matches my sneakers. (That is another story, just wish I had socks to match my sneakers.)

- Shoulder slings close to body. (This is a con also).
- There is a strap included (not pictured) that can be used to make the bag snugger (more snug) by going around the waist as well, not needed though.
- Small.
- Zipper pockets on the inside.

Cons:
- If you have your cgm on the right love handle at least for me the bag strap can rub it.
- The sling is really the only option, you can't let it hang like a normal messenger bag. (Pro also)
- Velcro. My normal Timbuk2 bag has a huge buckle closure. This is a Velcro only bag. Mind you this is not a big con. I mean if I am low and shaky and I need to access my emergency supplies it is "easier" to open. I would have preferred a clip is all. I do worry in the long run the Velcro may lose its ability to be stuck closed. The Velcro is a strong bond, so I don't think it will be doing that anytime soon and I am not worried that the bag will let something out of it.

I honestly don't have any major complaints. The bag will keep me from overloading my bag, which I have been known to do. It can and will hold my iPad easily. My soda can or two easily. My test kit easily. Along with assorted other things. I am really happy to be using this bag next week. I mean I wish the should pad was a little more comfy, but I mean that is only because of the fact if I were to be wearing it ALL day, it might begin to wear on me... Get it? Wear on me??? Seriously you guys need to have a better appreciate for my corny jokes or next week will be a LONG week.

On a scale of 1 - 10 I give the bag an 8.7 or for those of us in the states I guess that would be a 156, which is a slightly high number. Oh goodness I need help. These puns just aren't fun. Well they are for me, you, well I am sure some of you may have smacked your head on a wall/desk/hand by now. I am saving my "better" jokes for next week, I think.

Wordless Wednesday: Trying to keep comments clean

People have their hundreds on the meter and cgm. I have my 123's I like order. I also like the 96's on my cgm. Why? Simply put right side up, upside down the number is right both ways. Yes, yes it goes both ways. I went there! Sorry. Dirty! Awesome!

The Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda's

I just used this phrase over in a comment on Facebook about regretting or possibly not making a decision based upon external variables. This is probably one of the worst choices/decisions to face. The inevitable should I do this, but what about x, y, z? Followed by the fear, that maybe you made that choice poorly.

In life, time and time again we will face these decisions. Heck, I do face them often enough. Sometimes, I make the right choice, sometimes I have my own regrets. Yet I am learning from each time I encounter the end result of shoulda, woulda, coulda. The funny thing is that as I have matured in my diabetes, I am finally able to make my decisions based upon my other fears. You know bee's, there not being any cheese to eat, traveling alone, and of course the fear of tiny plane seats... :-p

When I was younger, I can't even begin to tell  you how big the list of my regrets is, not because of "fears", but because of my own fear of my diabetes. I mean travel out of state alone rarely happened. Doing a semester abroad?!? Really? Not gonna happen. All of these things that I could have done, I never did, because I was terrified of what could happen, what if I ran out of insulin, what if I went low? Heaven forbid the fear of traveling with a bag full of needles. (That was back in the day, when I actually used my syringes once.... I know, gross in reusing them, but when I traveled why would I want to bring 8,000 needles and try to figure out how to dispose of them.

I was an idiot on some levels for my own fears. I have some regrets now about what I could have done and did not. The difference now is, well others have done it and survived the ordeal, AND I KNOW THIS NOW.

When I started writing this post, I did not mean to make it turn into a You Can Do This post, but somehow it has. I think on so many levels all things wander back into the neighborhood of You Can Do This. The funny things is, is well I can. I could have done a semester abroad, it would have been a bitch and a half to make sure I did everything right and always had supplies and such. Yet I could have done it. I could have done x,y, and z, with my friends away from home if I planned it out right. Those regrets and fears I had, now seem inconsequential, well not the fear of bees. That is totally valid, I hide from those f-ers like it's my job.

Everything else though, aside from maybe going into outer space ( I think that is an area of expertise that I currently will not be adding to my resume. Imagine losing your last two bottles of insulin out of the airlock and the next supply drop isn't for 2 months.... That could be messed up). Anything else, really the sky is the limit. The Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda's, must not/cannot exist when you are tying to do things d-related. If you want to do something, there is a way. It may take time and effort and planning, but you can do whatever you want. Just plan it out right. That is what matters at the end of the day.

Completely unrelated. I need to write my post about my new murse find. I have played with it for two weeks and I think I can give it an honest review. Hopefully tomorrow.

The Sigh Continues

Last night I tweeted two very frustrating, dare I say fustrating images.

The first is my 3 hour trend graph of Happy Dex readings. You see how that nice little trend line is so not doing much out of the sub 80 range. And the current BG is 46. Yeah. Looks great doesn't it?!?! Let's go to the 24 hour graph. Aside from some major attack spikes of ice cream, handfuls of m&m's, gorges of meals, I haven't cleared 155 in the past 24 hours.

I mean 155 I don't want to be there either, but the point is. I don't want to be at the 46 I was showing last night either. Yet still be able to tweet the images. To text with Jess who awesomely reached out to me, knowing why I am so annoyed about this annoyance. So many innuendo's about not being about not being able to keep my sugars up.... and such dirty joke wise have gone through my head. But I am not even going to attempt to go there. It is just not how I roll today.

Maybe I hit a sweet spot with my infusion set. I am sure some of it could be end of life for the CGM as well. But I am just getting annoyed. I am cautiously counting to make sure what I am eating and giving myself are what they should be. But doesn't seem to matter. I barely bolused for lunch today. And here is another fine example of me and my D playing well together.

I thought maybe this 43 was a phantom number, so I checked with my desk meter. Nope that gave me a 51. The only thing in this picture that made me smile were all the penguins on my desk. Today I am just very disgruntled. I am so not gruntled. On a die note, even though my spell check is telling me that gruntled is not a word. I don't think I have ever heard someone use the word gruntled before. It apparently has a definition. Who knew?? I just thought it was fluff, so one can be disgruntled.

ANYWAY, sorry about that. Today is just a day to be annoyed I guess. I am happyish. Well not. I feel fine. Sadly. I have eaten stuff to treat the low. Who knows how long the latest glucose tab attempt will work. I am guessing not long. I will just continue my annoyed, non-gruntled vigilance.

Today is a D must Die day. See what I did there?? Haha. At least I can joke if nothing else. Not happily blogging at 51 right now. Gimme a cookie. I am outta here!

B