The Myth's and the Mythed

Haha, get it. Oh I slay myself. Seriously I do. I love the fact that there were random events out there to save me from the boringness of my bloopers and obviously my ability to create nifty words. I thought about bloopers and well they are just not that hysterical. I mean Mike over at The Diabetics Corner Booth hinted at this. So why even pretend that it was an original idea and creatively recreate his random ramblings... Sorry Mike. So I was getting miffed that I had nothing clever to say today. Thank the Diabetes Muses that there were random topics to cover ones ass that made things easier for me today. So instead of talking about the time my friend Victor got his hand caught in my tubing or the time I was low and had the drops and literally threw food that was on my tray everywhere, I would move onto the myths out there. Mainly one Myth. SPRINKLES!!!!

Yes, I may have borrowed this picture from Twitter, but hell Sprinkles is very hard to track down and talk to. I have tried a few times and I get lost in a trail of rainbows, glitters, and cupcakes. I know weird, but true.
A few days ago, I actually had a visit from Sprinkles. I was shocked, I mean Sprinkles literally knocked the unicorn/cupcake socks off my feet. I was sitting in my room and poof there was a rainbow explosion and there was Sprinkles standing there. I didn't know what to do. So I just stared, obviously shoulda grabbed my phone, ipod, camera, anything and everything that was hanging out next to me and take a picture, but I forgot. What was I thinking. I mean come on Sprinkles in plain site. But well I panicked.
So I did the only thing I could do. Sit with my mouth wide open and go "..... sp... spr... SPRINKLES". And that was it. The poof happened again, and Sprinkles was gone and so were my socks. However, my doubts of the existence of said unicorn are no more. I mean come on. If Sprinkles appears to me as a sign... oh and my sugar was like 97 so this was not a low hallucination,  I know now to be a believe. That and the fact that Sprinkles left my room smelling of cupcakes, I hate that rainbow toting Unicorn for that. But alas all is good. I am the forgiving type. I do love the random encounters on the net with Sprinkles. My favorite being a link I shared with Kimface a few weeks ago. I think Sprinkles does have a part time job working on commercials for Progressive. I mean check out this video and you can't deny the fact. I love it. So yeah, Sprinkles is real and now I hate the smell of cupcakes, it has been a 3 day craving for me. Stupid Unicorn I am quite mythed at Sprinkles.

Letter to Self

This is the 2nd day of Diabetes Blog Week, today's option is Letter Writing Day, where we can write a real or fictional letter somehow connected to diabetes - to an endo, an actual meter or pump company, or maybe a letter from one's adult self to the D-Child you were.

I had to think really hard about who I would write this letter to. I mean there have been many options out there to write to. Yes, I could write a letter to my endo... but well I like my endo, she is nice and we get along swell. I mean, sometimes our meetings are short and all, but that is not here fault sometimes. Things are good with us. I could write to Animas or Dexcom and tell them what I am looking for in a pump or not a pump at all. That could be fun. However, I know these companies do research and I am sure they already know what many of us are looking for. The full integration piece is awesome so that is what I am leaning towards. Maybe a slightly quieter pump my Ping is loud at times, but ehh... why wast my time.
Instead, I thought it would be good to write a letter to the person who has been in my life as a PWD who probably needed the most inspiration and ass smacking over the years. Myself.

Dear Brian,
It's me, a much older and well most likely wiser version of you writing to you about life as a person with diabetes in the future. I know you don't want to hear this, because well I know I didn't want to hear this but well I am going to pass my wisdom on to you anyway. Maybe you will ignore me, well I know what you will do. You will get pissed off that someone dares to talk to you about have diabetes. Who the hell am I to do that anyway? Yes, you think you know what you are doing. Yes you have survived doing what you have for so many years. I can't fault that. But just listen and think about things for a few minutes.
First and for most. Yes, a good, low a1c is nice, you can avoid many major complications. Yes what you have been doing shot wise is pretty good as well. But well you were never really taught about that entire difference between your NPH and your R/Humalog insulin. This is very important. Because while yes the twice daily injections of NPH are fine and keep you going at the 20 units a shot, the use of the fast acting insulin was not really explained to you. There is really no need to take the amount of insulin you were taking. The 15 units in the morning and evening while yes balanced out your sugars, have been dropping you low for years, this is why you are going to be hypo unaware. The Humalog insulin is not long term. It moves fast, it drops your sugar. You wonder why you were low so often. It had nothing to do with being cunning or outsmarting your illness. You could have died. In fact in the future you will come close a few times due to your ignorance. It is not really your fault. As far as I can remember I don't quite remember any of our endo's from the first at diagnosis to the last one we had before moving to a pump, really explaining this insulin and carbs and shit to us. You are lucky and were lucky. Take a few minutes to educate yourself and ask questions. I promise you can still control your a1c's. I promise.
That was probably the most important thing. Testing, testing goes hand in hand with everything else. Yes it is a pain in the ass. Especially back in the day when meter's took a minute to test. The longest minute ever. Yet, some of your issues and problems could have been avoided had you tested more. You might have seen the affects of the insulin regime you were on. Instead, you took a long hiatus from testing because of the waste of time you found it to be. You are given 168 hours in the week to do with as you please. Why not waste a few minutes of that time to keep an eye on things. Than maybe mom won't keep asking you, "Brian are you ok? You seem grumpy, do you need to eat?" Yes those questions are annoying, but there is a reason to this. Your mom actually is paying attention and cares. Don't be a fool.
So those are the big things. But I just want to encourage you to take a more active stance on life and take control of being a person with diabetes. There are camps out there to get involved in, something I never did. It will be awesome if you go. You can talk to people and learn stuff. Stuff you might need. People I know who went to camps loved it. Pumps are not a bad thing. They are not for people who can't "control" their diabetes or did a poor job. You are an idiot for thinking that. Hell where did you even get that idea? Idiot I swear. Well again, you will learn more when you meet people who also are PWD's. Don't ignore them. Talk to them. It will help. You are truly not alone in this.
At the same time, don't change. You will be an awesome guy. Have people laughing at you all the time. you can be a positive force in the hidden world you have chosen to hide in. I promise you, it is worth it. You meet some characters. I know and hell you will become one yourself. I hope this helps. But I promise you, this is just some friendly advice from well you. I know you won't like to hear this, but I thought you should know some stuff. It will help you from other more embarrassing moments.

Sincerely,
Brian at 29 years and 14 years with D.



So I mailed myself this letter, and I got a response. I hate younger Brian.

Dear Old Man Brian,
I just got your message. I wanted to thank you for your concern with how I deal with my diabetes. But you see, I know what I am doing and nothing bad has happened. Why should I fix something that isn't broke. I don't really care what you think. You and your "years" of experience. My years have kept me safe and well f-off. Sorry, don't care. I can handle this on my own.
Sincerely,
Brian the smarter and wiser

Awe

While I know it is never a good sign when one wanders away from the purported topic of a week of blogging on the first day. I apparently am going to do that. While I do read other peoples blogs, more often than not I end up reading the blogs of those people with diabetes who tend to be type-1's. Mind you it has nothing to do with anything other than the fact that I read what seems to be most similar to what I may be facing on a daily basis.
The thing though is that what I admire about those who blog about their illness, is that these individuals are "older" than I am. Granted this is a very relative term and all, since some are like a few months older or years. But it is still interesting to read what those who are older have to say. I mean Kimface over at Texting my Pancreas, is a good 6 months tops older. So I mean the term is all relative.
Yet at the same time, it is good to see the positive sides of humor that exist out there, when talking about the big D. I never spoke about it, I never informed people. Hell, some of my friends until I got my first insulin pump 3ish years ago, had no clue. It was just not something to talk about for me. No embarrassment or fear of judgment. It was just a personal matter, that I dealt with as I could.
Than you meet people, and things change. You make a friend who you can truly talk to about having the big D and realize, "hell it isn't just me." Followed by perusing the WWW and finding so much more. You stumble into places like Juvenation and meet friends. These friends drag you into the entire DOC and you meet more people. How awesome is that. Yet it all had to have started with a blogger out there somewhere. I place all the blame on Gina from so many places, Juvenation, Diabetes Talk Fest... The list goes on and on. But it's people like that who get things going.
Those are the ones I admire. They each have their own days of life sucks. I hate having this illness. Yet, when others have that same thing, those same bloggers are there for them. They unite the community to fight evil, like Voltron or the Power Rangers (many become one).

I heart Voltron. Sorry, random distraction, I do have bright shiny object syndrome. Anywho, but to see those members of the DOC unite to help those in need. Either because they are depressed or sad, newly diagnosed, parents, etc. The entire group is out there. The info is spread via blogs, twitter, facebook. I mean the list goes on and on. It is awesome to see what happens when you do unite. I mean the lot of you stormed the online mailbox/facebook of Senator Scott Brown to right a wrong.
This is what I admire. It is the community together. While yes I may lean towards the other groups of those closest to my age. But in the end. It is not just them. It is everyone. I can't go on because I would just be blathering more and more. But you get the point I am sure. I <3 them all. Or in my book, I butt cheeks them all, because well that looks like a butt more than it does a backwards heart. Just saying.

The hypo thinker

There are many conversations/discussions about the negative unplanned/random/annoying attacks of the hypo. I mean, going hypo while driving, not good. Sleeping, not good. Well in general the hypoglycemia attack is never a good thing. However, last week, while I was stressing about so many different things, I realized I was slipping low.
Beepy McBeeperson, had yet to warn me, but I knew it was coming. So I did a check and sure enough I was at 77 with that straight down arrow showing up on the Dexcom. The thing was, here I am sitting on my bed and I really did not care that I was going low, (which is a sign that I need to do something). When I get very lackadaisical like that, I know I am going to need to do something, before I black out. The thing is, right at that moment, I also had a huge moment of clarity. Have you ever run into that in your lows?
I wonder if it is due to a lack of sugar affecting the brain, but the stress that I was feeling was gone, the annoyance, gone. And I was able to look at everything that I was bothering me and in a more rational response, come up with a good clear solution. There were no emotions in the way. It was just a clear perspective. I was really amazed. I mean, I know I should be saying don't try this at home, but for me it was unplanned. But I realized that this has happened before.
There have been many occasions, more than I would like to readily admit that this is happened. Yet, I realized that while obviously the entire no desire to eat or correct the problem is a bad thing. This time it was a "nice" hypo. Because at least in my mind, I had achieved a relaxation that I had been missing for some time. It was a shame though, that it was due to a low.
One warning though. While for me, I was able to clear my head and come up with answers to my problems, I really need to remember to write those ideas down. Because, one issue with going low is moments of forgetfulness such as to what some of those insights were... Sigh. It was good while it lasted though.