It's true. I have many reasons to hate the DOC some days. Today you get the reasons in list form. Hey I'm lazy.
10.) Time: Do you know how much time I waste reading incite full blogs, comments on twitter, trying to follow all that is going on with my friends, while also trying to work?? Impossible.
9.) Twitter: Up until last year Twitter was something I had, but barely used. I followed some friends, but really it was an annoyance more than anything else. Now I can't help but have to use twitter, my phone, my ipod, my ipad. All have twitter so I can keep an i on things... Get it and i???? Oh I kill myself.
8.) Laughter: My office used to just have music coming out of it. Now I have to be careful that I don't start laughing to hard. People walk by, they look at me, ask questions. Yet how can I explain to them half of the reason why I am laughing my ass off. Usually Kimpants is the culprit. The conversation about the "fixing" of Billy Corgin was by far one of the worst for both of us.
7.) Tears: The same thing as laughter or more induced. I don't normally laugh so hard that I cry. Yet sometimes now more than ever in my life it happens so often. The conversations, again on Twitter, in Google Hangouts, on blogs are to much sometimes. I laugh, I cry, thankfully I don't piddle. It is amazing.
6.) Exercise: I hate to exercise, even though I try to do it daily. Some days I just DO NOT WANT TO. Yet on those days, I see the posts from various bloggers and twitterers and I know it is the right healthy thing to do. They inspire me.
5.) Cluesless: Mind you they are not clueless, I was. I did not know until I found the DOC how many people were in the same boat as I was. Some people having the same motivation issues I was having. Some having less. Others who had different problems. Yet we are all bonded as one sharing thoughts, ideas, time, and energy.
4.) Mothering: I have now adopted more mothers who worry about me. Yet it is good. You mention a low and people worry about you if you don't say anything after awhile.
Yeah that one low resulted in a me who had gone to bed early getting a text to check on me. Followed by me getting goaded into a Hangout. Mind you this is not a complaint.
3.) Mail: I got more mail now. None of it is spam or people asking for money, well sometimes. But postcards, jokes, CANDY!!! It is awesome.
2.) Bacon: I know this is a weird one. Apparently the DOC has this weird thing for unicorns, sprinkles, and Bacon. I'm a vegetarian who has developed an unnatural craving for Bacon now. Seriously guys, knock the crap out. I have only so much will power and I am convinced that Bacon is the gateway drug back to meat.
1.) Money: or lack there of. I have a decent job, the pay is not great, but I have no kids, I have no college to save for. So what money I have is mine. Yet I know it really isn't I seem to be bleeding money since I wandered into the DOC oh so many years ago. From #FFL11 last year where so much money disappeared into. The trip I am planning to visit Jess and Josh. The more money I have to spend for next years #FFL12 meetup. My money is going fast. I am fine with it. Money spent on friends is well worth it.
Yet had I known all of these things when I wandered into the DOC a few years back, would I still have done it??? Hell yeah. I hate them for it. For making me at home with them. Becoming my friend. For listening to me, humoring the bad jokes. I hate them for the laughter and tears. But if I go back to eating bacon, you guys are all dead. It is only a matter of time.
I kinda hate the DOC too - for all the same reasons as you do.
ReplyDeleteExcept #6. Nothing will make me do that!
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ReplyDeleteUmm, yeah, my comment that I deleted sounded.. um... a little off so I feel the need to retype it. We love you, too! And you know something else you forgot... how the DOC won't let something go. Like a typo resulting in complex crabs.
ReplyDeletei love this post. a lot. brilliant, my friend.
ReplyDeleteand i am SO EXCITED for you to come visit! :)
I love this post too dude. Makes me go from grinning and chuckling to nodding knowingly. See you in Florida!
ReplyDelete